I looked at my bank account in 2014 and wondered what the hell I did.
I had done so well in the 3 months before sans coach or mentor, but obliterated it on a VIP day with a reputable coach in the industry because I wanted to go to the next level and I believed I could not do it by myself.
Well the VIP day came and went, the coach tried to up-sell me into her bigger program in the slimiest way and I said no.
I left the whole experience realizing I knew what I needed to do from the beginning, but I wanted confirmation my idea was a good one. I wanted approval and that approval cost me thousands of dollars.
Some lessons you learn the hard way.
This lesson of self-trust has happened every year in my business since I started. While the lesson has become less costly over time, it has shown me what I need to clean up within myself so that I can trust my inner guidance and trust myself to get it done.
The first lesson of self-trust came when I first started my business in 2012. I had a ton of inner guidance around what I needed to do to build my business. However, I paid a hefty sum to a mentor and while taking her advice I made no money. When I finally gave my guidance a go, I made 8K.
The second lesson was when I had my son in 2013. I had a coach at the time. I really did not need a coach I was making good money in my business that paid the bills as I was a single mother for the first 16 months of Cael’s life. I really needed to focus on my mental health and transitioning to motherhood instead of going hard in my business. I didn’t listen. But when I let that coach go in early 2014, I made $12K almost immediately. Go figure.
The third lesson was in 2014. I did not have a coach and made a lot of money the first 3 months of the year. Then I went to a conference and signed up for a VIP day because I thought she knew more than I did. Turns out she did not.
The fourth lesson was later in 2014, I hired a different coach, she was awesome a real up level in terms of what was possible for me, but the masculine drive was too much. I started to doubt myself in my abilities to keep up. That lesson lasted for 18 months and was a question of whether or not I was going to trust the Feminine way of creating or kill myself in a masculine dominated business model. Instead of beating myself up for not living up to her expectations, I realized I could make money more easily by conserving my energy.
When you don’t trust yourself it costs you in your money, your mental health, energy levels, confidence, relationships, and your time.
You give up so much, when you give your power away to what you perceive to be better than you.
Quite honestly, it sucks.
Plus, the reality is, if you never trust yourself to build your business, you will constantly look for others to save you, your business, or both.
In each of the situations, I had to evaluate what I wanted and create from the space of my desire. Once I knew what I wanted and I could lean into what was true for me at the time, I could choose the right steps to take.
Here the steps to building self-trust in yourself to be successful in your business that I took to overcome and get better at trusting myself…
- Know what you want. Get super clear on what you want for the next 6 months of your life at least. Lack of clarity around you desires scatters your energy, while the more specific you are the more focused you will be.
- Listen to your inner voice and take action on it. You listen and listen and listen, but until you take action on what you hear inside you won’t see how awesome the results are. This takes practice discern your ego voice from higher guidance, but once you get it, you’ll never know how you ever went without it.
- Pay ATTENTION to your success patterns. The Universe shows your path every single day. Imagine me blasting this one on a megaphone. I missed so many opportunities because they did not show up the way I was “told” they would or I had such low self-confidence that I did not see the opportunities for me.
- Know your gremlins of where you don’t trust yourself and work on them. If you are an approval-seeker, admit it. If you’re afraid to make a move on you’re own because you don’t want to get it wrong, admit it. Once you know where you trip up the most become present to it so that you can stop it before it starts and deal with the emotions or beliefs the situation triggers.
- Follow the energy of alignment. Being in a state of alignment is about recognizing the truth of what you really want and taking action from that state of being. If something feels off, take a step back and find your alignment before taking your next action.
- Develop your intuition. Having a strong intuition helps you hear your higher guidance. Knowing the difference between your higher self and ego is important to make aligned decisions. I use my intuition and I use Akashic Records to achieve that goal. I like using Akashic Records to get to the source of everything, heal, and manifest.